#29 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

Women have always piloted war planes and space shuttles. (Class of 2016, #23)

There has always been a woman on the Supreme Court, and women have always been traveling into space. (Class of 2003, #4)

In an earlier post, I pointed out that since two-thirds of Americans couldn’t name any Supreme Court Justices, the court’s membership isn’t much of a cultural touchstone. Sadly, the identity of astronauts is probably similarly unknown.

The BML Class of 2003 list has a double-barreled item about women having always been on the Supreme Court and traveling in space. Sandra Day O’Connor joined the U.S. Supreme Court in 1981, the birth year of much of the class of 2003. So that much is right (if you accept the BML’s nonstandard use of the word “always”). But the first “woman in space” was Valentina Tereshkova, who piloted a Vostok spacecraft into orbit in 1963, around the time the class of 1985 was being born. It’s just not that hard to look this stuff up.

Thirteen years later Messrs. McBride and Nief returned to the topic of women in space for the Class of 2016 with another double-barreled question. The first female Space Shuttle pilot was Eileen Collins, who piloted the Discovery in 1995, a year after the BML-approved birth year for the Class of 2016. The first American female fighter pilot was Jeannie Leavitt in 1993 (although women had been flying fighter planes in Turkey starting in 1936 and in Soviet Union during World War II). So the chronology works out even if neither of these facts has anything to do with “cultural touchstones” or “mindsets.”

#28 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

Americans and Russians have always cooperated better in orbit than on earth. (Class of 2017, #30)

Russians and Americans have always been living together in space. (Class of 2014, #43)

The U.S. and the Soviets have always been partners in space. (Class of 2006, #22)

Messrs. McBride and Nief are running out of ideas. That’s one of the impressions I get from going through multiple Mindset Lists looking for recurring topics, something most people who have not devoted themselves to the mockery and eventual destruction of the Beloit Mindset List have likely not done.

It should go without saying that Russians and Americans working together in space has nothing to do with the mindset of matriculating college students—because (1) the Apollo-Soyuz Test Project took place nearly 40 years ago and (2) most people just aren’t interested that much in the topic—but since Messrs. McBride and Nief don’t care about accuracy, facts, and such, they really have a lot of freedom to make up interesting and creative stuff. Instead we get the same items repeating every few years.

(Note also that the most recent list had just 60 items—or about one half item a week for each member of the Mindset team—rather than the 75 items that had become the standard.)

Has the task of coming up with several dozen “facts” about college freshmen each year proven so difficult for these two guys that they need to borrow from their previous lists? Or have they simply forgotten what was on their previous lists and are unable to find said lists on the microfilm they use to do their “research”?

The suggestion that the mindset of the Class of 2006 was shaped by knowledge involving citizens of a country that hadn’t existed since they were three-year-olds is just another piece of evidence that Messrs. McBride and Nief really can’t be bothered to get things right.

#27 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

Someone has always gotten married in space. (Class of 2014, #48)

This week I’m going to examine the dozen Mindset List items related to space travel and exploration. My initial assumption about the above item, apparently about space weddings, was that it belonged to one of the largest Mindset List categories: things that happened approximately 18 years ago that most 18-year-olds don’t care about.

However, as far as I can tell, there were no space weddings circa 1992, before 1992 or after 1992. There has never been a space wedding.

In 2003 a male cosmonaut in orbit and a woman at NASA’s John Space Center in Houston were married so I guess that one person has “gotten married in space” but seven years is a short “always” even by Mindset List standards. (The first wedding in a reduced gravity aircraft took place in 2009.)

Outer space contains many mysteries and I guess this Mindset List item is just another one of them.

Mindset List Items from the Future #2: Class of 2035 Mindset List

For this generation of entering college students, born in 2013, Chinua Achebe, James Gandolini, Nelson Mandela, and Jang Song-thaek have always been dead.

1. They might see Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, Kate Middleton, and Prince William at parents’ weekend.

2. Their parents may have been twerking the day they were born.

3. News of their birth may have been leaked by Edward Snowden.

4. Having two living popes is no big deal.

5. There has always been a Higgs boson.

6. Marathon runners have always been wearing flak jackets.

7. Their parents were playing Candy Crush while they were left crying in their cribs.

8. They were paid their allowances in bitcoins.

9. They have always been watching original programming on Netflix. What is ABC?

10. “Blurred Lines” and “Wrecking Ball” play on the Golden Oldies station.

11. The first Christmas music they heard was by Duck Dynasty.

12. Chelyabinsk has always been known for meteor strikes, not for its role in Pugachev’s Rebellion.

13. People have always been getting fired for inappropriate tweets.

14. Their first eyewear was Google Glasses. What are corrective lenses?

15. Their parents told them babies are delivered by Amazon helicopter drones.

16. During recess, they played the knockout game.

17. George Zimmerman has always never been guilty of killing Trayvon Martin, who has always never been not dead.

#26 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

Having grown up with MP3s and iPods, they never listen to music on the car radio and really have no use for radio at all. (Class of 2016, #15)

They have had to incessantly remind their parents not to refer to their CDs and DVDs as “tapes.” (Class of 2016, #29)

Their parents’ car CD player is soooooo ancient and embarrassing. (Class of 2017, #57)

One of the recent conceits on the Beloit Mindset List is that not only do matriculating college students use newer technology than their parents, but this difference is a source of conflict, confusion and embarrassment.

The item from 2016, suggesting that parents are confused by CDs and DVDs and call them “tapes,” is one of my candidates for dumbest entry in the history of the Mindset List. Compact discs have been around since the 1980s and DVDs since the 1990s. The parents of the Class of 2016 are very familiar with them. And even if they weren’t, why would they call them tapes? Is this supposed to be funny?

The item from the Class 2017 list claims that having a CD player in the family car is embarrassing. As of 2013, there are still new cars with CD players. Cassette tape players weren’t discontinued until 2010 so probably plenty of members of the Class of 2010 have those as well.

You would think that Messrs. Nief & McBride would have done more research on the topic of car audio systems since they actually corrected an item on that topic a year earlier.

Item #15 for the Class of 2016 originally read “Having grown up with MP3s and iPods, they never listen to music on the car radio and really have no use for radio at all.” Critics pointed out that there is actual data that disproves this claim:

The fact is, nearly 90% of all 12-24s in America listen to broadcast radio every week.  That’s documented by Arbitron’s national numbers.  More than 22 million 12-17 year-olds listen to radio every week, while nearly 27 million 18-24s – the “college years” demographic – are still tuning in AM/FM radio even though they have iPods, smartphones, and tablets available to them. (What’s On Your Mind(set)?)

This resulted in Messrs. Nief & McBride changing #15 to read: “While still fans of music on radio, they often listen to it on their laptops or replace it with music downloaded onto their MP3s and iPods.” (The introductory text still reads, “In these students’ lifetimes, with MP3 players and iPods, they seldom listen to the car radio.”)

This correction raises several questions: (1) How many times have items on the Beloit Mindset List been corrected? (2) Why aren’t the Mindset List items that have been proven wrong on Beloit Mindlessness being corrected? (3) Why did the Mindset List duo make up a ridiculous fact about car audio systems just a year after they were caught making up another one?

#25 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

GM means food that is Genetically Modified. (Class of 2017, #3)

Having a chat has seldom involved talking. (Class of 2017, #8)

Gaga has never been baby talk. (Class of 2017, #9)

Plasma has never been just a bodily fluid. (Class of 2017, #19)

Java has never been just a cup of coffee. (Class of 2017, #29)

A Wiki has always been a cooperative web application rather than a shuttle bus in Hawaii. (Class of 2017, #50)

“Words developing new meanings” is one of the Mindset List’s favorite tropes as these six items from the Class of 2017 list demonstrate. In fact, a word developing a new meaning is ipso facto a cultural touchstone regardless of the actual importance of the thing the word means.

Plasma is a flat panel display technology that was invented in 1964 at the University of Illinois, used to make big screen TVs in the mid-1990s, overtaken  by LCD technology in the 2000s, and apparently soon to be phased out of production. Java is a software platform/computer language. Members of the Class of 2017 may have watched a plasma TV or used a Java application, but they don’t have to be familiar with the terms. If these technologies hadn’t been invented, we’d be doing the same things with some similar technology. Their Mindset noteworthiness (over dozens of other electronic technologies popularized in the mid-1990s) is that they are named using words that also mean something else.

The item about “Gaga” relies on the Mindset conceit that new meanings of words crowd out old ones. The existence of the entertainer Lady Gaga (née Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta) means that young people can’t conceive that “gaga” could also be used to stand for stereotypical baby talk. (Or in Mindset argot, gaga has never been baby talk.)

(It would be interesting to know if there is any pattern to which new meanings, like “plasma” and “java,” render older meanings “never just” and which new meanings cause older meanings to “never have existed”.)

Similarly “chat” isn’t used to refer to talking anymore. (Or maybe Messrs. Nief & McBride believe that young people are no longer interested in speaking in person. Cf. Class of 2017 item #45 [“They have never really needed to go to their friend’s house so they could study together.”])

Wikis, especially Wikipedia, is one of those rare Mindset List items that may actually belong on a list of cultural touchstones, but its significance has nothing to do with the earlier use of the term as a Hawaiian shuttle bus. Similarly, the significance of genetically modified food has nothing to do with its abbreviation.

#24 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

They aren’t surprised to learn that the position of Top Spook at the CIA is an equal opportunity post. (Class of 2017, #39)

Can someone explain what this one means? My first thought was that around 1995, the CIA must have hired its first woman or non-white director. Thus, the Class of 2017, who must follow such things, would know that the position is an “equal opportunity post.”

However, it appears that every CIA director has been a white man.

The best I can figure is that the item is a reference to John Deutch’s attempt to hire more women and minorities. In 1995, he made Nora Slatkin the CIA’s executive director, which was the #3 position, not the “Top Spook.”

If that’s the case, this item strikes all the regular Mindset List chords: (1) It refers to something that happened around the birth year of the class. (2) The vast majority of the class knows nothing about it. (3) If they knew, most of them wouldn’t care. (4) It clearly isn’t a “touchstone” nor does it have anything to do with the class’s “mindset.” (5) It’s so poorly written that it’s not clear to what exactly it refers.

#23 in a Series Examining Every Item on the Beloit Mindset List

Planes have never landed at Stapleton Airport in Denver. (Class of 2017, #25)

Once in a while the Mindset List creators don’t even bother to pretend they are chronicling “cultural touchstones” or imparting useful information about incoming college students and just throw in some item that is likely based on some personal memory or inside joke. Maybe one of them or one of their friends used to live Denver. Maybe there is some senile professor at Beloit who gives long incoherent soliliques in class on getting lost in the Stapleton Airport when he was a boy. Maybe Tom McBride had a fruitless day looking at 1995 newspapers on microfiche and added this to the list so he wouldn’t feel like his day was a total loss. Maybe Stapleton is the last name of a girl Ron Nief took to the prom and “landed” is a double entendre.

Nothing is certain except that this item has nothing to do with the alleged purposes of the list and reflects the indifference Messrs. Nief & McBride have toward their audience.

Look at Who Else Is Mocking the Mindset List: #2170BeloitMindset

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